What Are Intangible Stressors?
When we talk about the “total load of stressors”, we often think about tangible things that contribute to a toxic body burden such as chemicals, heavy metals, and infections. However, the total load also includes stressors that are harder to measure and quantify. These types of stressors might include thoughts and beliefs, emotional stress, difficult family and relationship dynamics, or even generational trauma that still influences thoughts, feelings and actions in a family. We call these “intangible stressors” because they may be difficult to identify or measure, but they can be an important piece of the total load picture.
Remember, emotions are an important part of one’s overall health. Emotions quickly turn into chemicals inside our bodies (e.g. cortisol, adrenaline, and norepinephrine) and have an immediate or even lasting impact on our physiology. If emotions like fear or anxiety are chronically felt, even at a low level, the body is constantly producing fear and anxiety chemicals. A body bathed in negative emotions is bathed in negative chemicals and is not in a healing state. In other words, the body must feel safe to be able to heal and repair.
What are Some Examples of Intangible Stressors?
Unexpressed Emotions and Suppressed Truths
Emotions that are not acknowledged, felt, or expressed can become energetically stagnant and “held” in or around the body — especially anger, grief, resentment, and fear. Many of us have been taught to “stuff down” our emotions or we have not been given safe spaces to feel and express them. When adults in a household have stored or suppressed emotions, children or other sensitive individuals can feel and absorb these energies. This might result in children being in a hypervigilant state or a state of dysregulation in other forms.
Unresolved Intergenerational Trauma
Family constellation work teaches us that unhealed trauma or experiences from previous generations can unconsciously repeat in descendants. Illness may present itself in connection with an ancestor or family member’s unfinished grief, exile, or injustice in the lineage.
Secrets and Shame in the Family Field
Hidden stories (e.g., adoptions, abortions, abuse, addictions) hold energetic weight. When unspoken, they are still felt in the energetic field and can manifest as confusion, anxiety, or chronic dis-ease in family members — especially children, who are highly attuned to the “unsaid.”
Intangible Dynamics Between Family Members
In some families there can be unsaid but very real tension between parents or other family members that contributes to a stressful home dynamic and can be felt and internalized by children. This could be present within couples that are separating, divorcing or with tensions between a grandparent and a parent or in-laws. Children can be highly attuned to these types of tensions to the point where it affects their physical health.
There may be even more esoteric or spiritual origins to relationship dynamics. Some traditions believe that “soul contracts” (agreements established before or between lives or “Bardo” in Tibetan Buddhism) or Kharma might bring family members together with purposeful tensions or challenges as a means of spiritual evolution or growth or to resolve past life issues. Many of these traditions believe that struggle and stress are a calling to resolve more deeply rooted and complex issues. These spiritual traditions can provide guidance on how to resolve these issues and establish harmony between family members.
Inherited Beliefs and Subconscious Feelings
Beliefs like “I must sacrifice myself to be loved” or “I don’t deserve to be well” or “I don’t deserve to have an easy life” can be passed through the family system and stored in the subconscious mind. They subtly shape physiology via chronic stress or emotional repression. Subconscious beliefs can have a profound impact on an individual’s ability to heal from chronic health conditions. To learn more about how subconscious beliefs work and how to help overcome limiting beliefs, read Belief Work by Krista Rosen. You might also consider the work of therapies that help you explore and overcome subconscious emotions or beliefs from the past that no longer serve you, such as is the focus of Internal Family Systems by Richard Schwartz and carefully explained in his book No Bad Parts.
Unprocessed Birth or Preverbal Trauma
Traumatic birth experiences (emergency C-section, separation from mother, NICU stays) or early attachment disruptions may not be cognitively remembered but can be deeply embedded in the nervous system and can be a root of chronic dysregulation later in life.
Spiritual Stressors — Disconnection from Soul Purpose or Meaning
When individuals or families are disconnected from a sense of purpose, ritual, or spiritual connection, chronic illness may emerge as a “wake-up call from the soul.” In many spiritual traditions, illness is not just a biological breakdown, but a messenger. Some view serious chronic health or developmental issues in their children as a sacred wake-up call and invitation to become conscious and aware of forces, dynamics and influences that are harmful to health and wellbeing. When we bring these hidden or subconscious elements to our awareness, it can have a profound effect on healing. As an example, a child may have severe or complex health needs that require a mother to tap into her powerful intuitive capabilities to figure out what her child needs to heal. This work is not something that can be outsourced – through the child’s condition the mother is “invited” to learn how to deepen and evolve her own intuitive gifts. The development of intuition might be considered a spiritual calling for this mother. Some people choose to take this as a valuable invitation, while others may choose to reject it.
Energetic Blocks or Burdens in the Home
Homes might hold energetic imprints of past trauma, grief, conflict, or illness — creating a vibrational field that subtly drains the vitality of those living in it. In traditions like Traditional Chinese Medicine and Ayurveda, this may be described as a disharmony of qi or prana. Regular energetic clearing or being intentional about energy in spaces (smudging, sound, intention, or incorporating feng shui) can be used to help restore flow.
Lack of Coherence or Sacred Space
A home without coherence, rhythm, or sacred structure can feel energetically “loud” or unstable. In addition to modern home health stressors such as EMF, indoor toxins, and poor air quality, the way certain spaces are arranged can have the effect of dysregulating the subtle energy in our bodies. Biogeometry (founded by Dr. Ibrahim Karim), Vastu (Vedic architecture) and feng shui (Chinese geomancy) are practices that concern spatial layout, geometry, and physical space orientation to harmonize with nature and human well-being. There are practitioners trained in evaluating physical spaces to restore energy, balance, flow and coherence to living spaces.
Addressing Intangible Stressors and Healing the Whole Family
Acknowledging that there are real, intangible, energetic and “unseen” stressors in our lives that can contribute to chronic illness may be the first step toward healing. Human beings are complex creatures influenced by more than just genetics and environmental exposures. Spending time to acknowledge and address the intangible stressors in one’s life is not just a way to identify the root causes of dis-ease, it can also be a way to truly grow, evolve and optimize individual health and interpersonal relationships.
While there are skilled practitioners and spiritual guides who can help you identify and address these types of stressors in your life, there is also a lot you can do on your own to bring them to awareness. You can start by asking yourself some key questions:
- Are there areas in my home that feel stagnant, cluttered, or energetically ‘stuck’? Are there areas in my home that no one (including pets) likes to be in?
- Observe your interactions and responses to casual interactions with others in your family. Do you notice any signs of a stress response in these interactions such as a tightening of muscles, increase in heart rate or breathing, or do you feel anything uncomfortable in your gut when you are around certain places or people?
- Do you feel anxiety for no reason?
- Do you notice yourself repeating predictable negative patterns or emotions in your life around money, career, or relationships?
- Do you suffer from persistent feelings of fear, shame or guilt?
- What triggers you? Often times things that trigger you emotionally are rooted in old wounds of which you may not even have an awareness. Here is a tool for helping you identify the root cause of your triggers.
- Are you aware of ancestral trauma in your family’s lineage? Were your ancestors persecuted, abused or otherwise mistreated? Did you have any family members that were abusers?
If you identify a dynamic in your household that is contributing to you or your child’s stress, consider talking to a counselor or other professional or even a trusted friend about how you might address this stressor or your reaction to it.
If it is your own stress level or dysregulated nervous system that needs help, it is okay to seek help and support for yourself. The old saying to “put your oxygen mask on first before assisting another” isn’t just empty advice; it can be a powerful way for you to remove a major stressor in your child’s life, by attending to your own needs first. Remember, our children are picking up nonverbal and subtle cues from us all the time. If you are feeling stressed and dysregulated, your child can take on those qualities too or react adversely to them—even when you mean to shield them and protect them from these types of exposures. Take this type of stressor seriously; it can have a powerful healing effect for your whole family.
About Beth Lambert
Beth Lambert is a former healthcare consultant and teacher. As a consultant, she worked with pharmaceutical, medical device, diagnostic and other health care companies to evaluate industry trends.
She is the author of A Compromised Generation: The Epidemic of Chronic Illness in America’s Children (Sentient Publications, 2010). She is also a co-author of Documenting Hope's Brain Under Attack: A Resource for Parents and Caregivers of Children with PANS, PANDAS, and Autoimmune Encephalitis. She is a co-author of Reversal of Autism Symptoms among Dizygotic Twins through a Personalized Lifestyle and Environmental Modification Approach: A Case Report and Review of the Literature, J. Pers. Med. 2024, 14(6), 641.
In 2009, Beth founded Documenting Hope and currently serves as Executive Director. Beth attended Oxford University, graduated from Williams College and holds a Masters Degree in American Studies from Fairfield University.
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